Hell week complete

Oh my god, it’s been one week. I feel all amazing, I am able to do a lot more movements with my exersize. I can now feel myself able to move further and longer.
my Cylcle has been sporadic due to stress. My doctor says that is normal and now that I’m exercises my it will need to balance out. I’m not worried about little monsters because I haven’t been with the Ex husband for over 2 years.
I am so EXCITED! I have figured out that the calisthenics really work for me the reminders to do 2 sets of 10 are really helping me move more.
the only thing I cannot do yet is Planks.
not that I’m not trying. It’s just physically I am unable to do it since I have a large mass of fat that still lies on the floor.

I will get there!
I will post a one week pic if I am able. Which I’m not sure if I can. I’ve tried but it’s being weird.

Cheating in Small Doses

So I woke up extra early today, since I wasn’t able to sleep well and my body was just craving junk. I wanted a free set burger, some large fries! Spivey chicken sandwiches! I kept telling myself no and no. And thought of my Goal. Sexy red Dress. Hokey Pokey. TICKLE BEAST STAMINA! No greasy food.

It was starting to bother me when I remember something the EX husband said to me once. Cheat in small doses. Instead of a Burger. Make a BLT, use a large Roll, add extra Bacon. Give into the craving but not entirely. 
loopholes baby.

So I caved and I went to The Crack. (Jack In The Box) I was craving something greasy and remembered they have Egg roles. It’s fried but it’s veggies. And thy have that chicken bowl. Boom. 
bruh! I ate two egg rolls and I was stuffed. 
what the hell happened? I could polish off 10 easily. Now I can’t even handle 2?! 
I have to admit I’m pretty happy that I got full right away and it satisfied that craving.

Now fast food sounds gross. As punishment to myself I have done 3 five minute videos before I did my calisthenics. I found a new one under five minutes. And I’m finding I’m not getting as achey. 
For lunch I plan to have the Chicken Teriyaki Bowl. Rice is filling it has veggies and that chicken. I won’t use the sauce because it’s too sweet and I just got my A1C done and it has been jumping around.

Sexy red Dress. Sexy red dress


Physiological protesting At it’s finest.

Why? 3:30am? Why is my body awake? My entire schedule has been thrown off since exercises. It doesn’t bother me since Ive no hours (CORA). Plus I work NOC anyway. One thing that is really not helping are these constant and unrelenting Burps, I can feel the gas build up and if I move and be active I start Burping like I chugged a gallon or Sprite Remix 😶. 
I found an article online about a guy who had the same problem when he did his Personalized Diet. It gave me some interesting perspective. I’ll link it below. The Breathing exercise really helped me relax and now I’m tired.

Im foregoing the 30 minute walk and instead I and doing this amazing hip release. As an Massage Therapist. (NOT MASSSOUR!) I have taken courses on the technique and this is honestly the best Routine I’ve ever seen. My hip feels so much better. But now my massage on Monday is going to be DEMANDED. Does anyone feel their body is weird? What are some things that happen to you? Sometimes if I move my legs my pinky toe and fourth toe on the left side will cramp. The toe! Stupid Savk of Bones. 
https://youtu.be/lhbhay5_M-0Deep Breathing 



Ill post a 2 week progress pick next Tuesday, looking at myself I’ve noticed one side of my layer cake Fat is smoothing out. We can compare later. Also Check our the shop. My daughter made a Picture of me and the Ex Husband. So we designed her a shirt.

Shape shifting takes practice

So I started my diet last month, in August, I started off with light meals cut Soda and Sweets. No eating past 7:30pm. I lost 14 pounds, and as soon as I could bend over without hurting myself that’s when my Exercise plan started.

Five days ago I Weighed myself and found made it Below my goal. (300 pounds.) at 299.4 my work out Routine is 2 sets of 10 reps workingone different muscle group throughout the day. I have Reminders set on my health App. For 30 second calisthenics workouts. (Hybrid calisthenics is AMAZiNG!!) It has helped tremendously.

I was sore the Second and third day, but Yesterday I felt really good and started my Video work outs. MWF I do the five minute Arm Toning work out. STTS I do Five minute Glute work out. (For that nice Booty). Everyday I will be doing the five minute Abb and core work out. 

Today my daughter looked at me and said you’re don’t look like yourself Mommy.’ I was confused and asked what do you mean little Bird?’ She said that I lost weight and ‘don’t look like yourself.’.

I am Literally seeing no difference in myself. I still feel the same, my arms still rest on my two layers of cake when I sit down. My niece had mentioned I was loosing weight the other day and I told her I was Trying Really Hard. My niece doesn’t lie and she doesn’t sugar coat. She said ‘Tia I’m serious, you are loosing weight.’

The validation is motivating as Hell! Check out the Merch Shope when you have time.



Ripping off my skin

My sore body protested against all of my stretching. I admit I did get distracted and didn’t log in my lunch, I set up a merch shop and have no activity until I got on the laptop and realized I didn’t set it up yet.

I. Am. A dork. 
my morning walk turned into an 8pm wall since the kids were snacking on dessert. I took advantage and fled from the sugar cones my mother picked up for them.

Left over Homemade Salisbury steak dominated my lunch and dinner. And my smal calisthenics work outs err mostly an arms and back.

Today was arm Toning workout which my daughter loved. I am proud to say both of my kids got tired and gave up towards the last minute and a half and I didn’t stop once.

Small victories are so satisfying. I’m trying my hardest with the Ab and side work out too. I’ll need to get a Yoga Mat.

Heres the Ab and core workout video

and here’s the arms 

honestly this was the best arm workout I’ve ever done I can’t wait to continue on. Tomorrow will be the Booty and low Ab work out. Universe give me strength.

If anyone is interested here’s a link to my shop. My content is dark mature humor.



The devil made me do it

Magic number three I cannot begin to explain the burning pain of all the lactic acidosis build up in my arms. I spent the day Streching in little bursts throughout the day.

I am getting a massage next week, that is so needed now. And since today is day three I have started on the belly burning Ab core and side 5 minute work out. 

you can find the video here. 


I had my 10 year old daughter do it with me. She loved it and it will be our nightly 9pm work out before bed. Because honestly, I’d rather had fat burning tummy pain than arm pain.

Even though I didn’t do my 2 sets of 10 calisthenics exercises every few hours through out the the day. I substituted with streching. (Reminder BREATH WHILE STRETCHING)

Today my inspiration comes from my son, we had to do the Hokey pokey in his preschool lesson today. This Five year old stood and did every single dance move and didn’t wear out once. He even shouted again after the second run through.

I am not going to lie I felt really sad in that moment that I couldn’t Keep up with him YET. 

it is giving me more determination.

Goal for the Month: Do the Hokey Pokey with The Handsome Boy.


Self mutilation takes focus

My arms are super sore and my shoulders. I may have over did it with 4 sets of ten on wall pushups and the incline pushups.

note to self, start everything the same to build up tolerance. I noticed as soon as I got up and started my walk at least a few minutes in i feel more awake. 

my 30 minute walk was more 40 since my calves are on fire. I’ve developed a motivational theory, I will do these two small calisthenic work outs through out the day. (I personally want to do them everyday, because I want to remind my self to constantly move.) 

alternate, do my sides and hips first, instead of arms at 7am. then I’ll do legs for my 10am. Arms for my one pm. That way everyday I’m working the same muscles but I’m alternating throughout the day.

It’s day two and I’m motivating myself. It’s my body my workout. Changing it and minor tweets helps me feel in control. As long as I dedicate myself to two minutes every few hours a day to physical stimulation, I’m a million times more active Than I was before And it’s better than my being a lazy ass couch potato reading eastern Webnovels and eating loaves of French bread.

if you could lounge around all day in a fancy Hollywood give with the feathers, (Cassandra robes) and stuff your face with no judgement or consequences. What would you choose?

my choice would be bread, everything French bread from Walmart. I would eat the loaves for every meal.

it’s the end of the day my calves and entir body ache. I have legs to do at 7pm then the 30 minute walk. 

I found this great Video for stretching. I’ll try to document everyday at least a little bit of my work outs so I can make a video at the end of two weeks. I hope to god I keep up the motivation. 

if you feel like you’re not doing enough as a person. Remember this, Crows watch and wait until you die to pick at your rotting carcass. Don’t let them haters get the chance to take a bite.




Self destructive determination

Day 1 9/8/20

My journey with my mental health and weight loss has always been out of balance. Now I’m 32 divorced and I’ve finally started my journey to becoming a better me and a better person.I will share my thoughts in the Uncouth unfiltered moments they arrive. It’s taken me a long time to figure out what I want and now that I’ve started. I’m not stopping. I won’t tell my starting weight. It was well over 300 pounds. And now that I can bend over without moving. I’m on day 6 of my exercise plan. Taking small steps, not filling tradition diet plans and just cargo out my own course with the help from my doctors and science.My first day was really excited and really challenging. Starting my work out day at 5am has really made the day go by fast.

i have started off by doing Calisthenics, and only allowing myself to do 2 -3 reps of ten for for, abs sides, legs. 

ive also set a timer for five minutes a day of mediation and and stretching. After some weight loss it’s easier to bend and move. And I have found myself able to move more and feel really good stretches.

my last work out for tonight is assisted squats and jackknife squats. In truth I would rather work legs all day than arms. I’m doing both. But I do favor legs more. 

I am currently 299.4 pounds and I am more motivated than ever. My goals are to get healthy, so I can relieve my type two diabetes. Chase my kids and play with them.

and my one selfish personal goal. I want to wear a sexy body hugging red dress. Just to walk around target and look for all the clearance items.

in just as motivated now as I was this morning and I Know I will hit my Goal weight of 130lbs 

I hope you all have a positive and Happy day. If you don’t, just remember, a group of students at Harvard had to study the consistency of different poop in size color and solid to liquid ratio. Just to get graduate. 

At least you don’t have to study poop